1 00:00:19,068 --> 00:00:21,931 [bright instrumental music] 2 00:00:22,000 --> 00:00:24,793 ♪ ♪ 3 00:00:24,862 --> 00:00:26,655 Today is a big day. 4 00:00:26,724 --> 00:00:29,310 Today is the day Lincoln Loud becomes a man. 5 00:00:30,827 --> 00:00:32,655 And I am super pumped. 6 00:00:32,724 --> 00:00:35,310 I've always been known as the man with the plan, 7 00:00:35,379 --> 00:00:37,586 but tonight I'm going to take it up a notch. 8 00:00:37,655 --> 00:00:39,344 My best friend Clyde and I will be watching 9 00:00:39,413 --> 00:00:41,206 the "Rip Hardcore Midnight Marathon" 10 00:00:41,275 --> 00:00:43,344 and getting our official Macho Man badges. 11 00:00:43,413 --> 00:00:45,517 Ooh! Watch my midnight marathon. 12 00:00:45,586 --> 00:00:46,586 Yeah! 13 00:00:46,655 --> 00:00:48,379 Put in promo code "MACHOMAN." 14 00:00:48,448 --> 00:00:50,000 Oh, yeah. Macho! 15 00:00:50,068 --> 00:00:52,758 And I will personally send you your Macho Man badge. 16 00:00:52,827 --> 00:00:54,241 Macho Man badges are not gender specific. 17 00:00:54,310 --> 00:00:55,482 Rip Hardcore isn't just super ripped. 18 00:00:55,551 --> 00:00:57,344 He's super woke and super ripped. 19 00:00:57,413 --> 00:00:59,793 I am totally getting that Macho Man badge! 20 00:00:59,862 --> 00:01:01,862 There's nothing cooler than a badge. 21 00:01:01,931 --> 00:01:04,206 That's why I want to join the FBI as a badge maker. 22 00:01:05,448 --> 00:01:07,241 Maybe I'll even grow some chest hair. 23 00:01:07,310 --> 00:01:09,137 Too pink? [toilet flushing] 24 00:01:09,206 --> 00:01:11,344 When you're the only boy in the family with 10 sisters, 25 00:01:11,413 --> 00:01:12,965 you learn two things. 26 00:01:13,034 --> 00:01:15,379 Number one, always put the toilet seat down 27 00:01:15,448 --> 00:01:17,137 when you're finished. - Ahh! 28 00:01:17,206 --> 00:01:18,896 Lincoln! - My bad. 29 00:01:18,965 --> 00:01:20,448 - Where's my lucky guitar pick? - And number two-- 30 00:01:20,517 --> 00:01:21,655 Hey, stinkhead. 31 00:01:21,724 --> 00:01:23,034 You got to reserve your TV time. 32 00:01:23,103 --> 00:01:24,586 Hops farted again! 33 00:01:24,655 --> 00:01:28,137 I've even staked out my favorite spot on the couch. 34 00:01:28,206 --> 00:01:29,551 [grunts] 35 00:01:30,620 --> 00:01:32,689 Guess this one's out of flips. 36 00:01:32,758 --> 00:01:35,965 The only thing left to do is prepare the midnight snacks. 37 00:01:36,034 --> 00:01:37,586 [snores] 38 00:01:37,655 --> 00:01:39,931 Ah, the life of a chef. 39 00:01:40,000 --> 00:01:42,586 Poor guy works too hard. 40 00:01:42,655 --> 00:01:44,413 Dad? Dad? 41 00:01:44,482 --> 00:01:45,724 Step aside, Lincoln. 42 00:01:45,793 --> 00:01:48,206 This is a job for my gag flower. 43 00:01:48,275 --> 00:01:49,862 Does that thing even work? 44 00:01:54,206 --> 00:01:56,275 OK, then. 45 00:01:56,344 --> 00:01:58,172 [squelching] 46 00:01:58,241 --> 00:01:59,517 And now it's out of water. 47 00:01:59,586 --> 00:02:01,448 Where am I? What day is it? 48 00:02:01,517 --> 00:02:03,379 Did I miss my half birthday? 49 00:02:03,448 --> 00:02:05,655 My dad loves his half birthday. 50 00:02:05,724 --> 00:02:08,344 Last thing I remember is coming into the kitchen 51 00:02:08,413 --> 00:02:10,551 to fix a late-night chocolate cake for my half birthday, 52 00:02:10,620 --> 00:02:12,379 which I love. - Told you. 53 00:02:12,448 --> 00:02:15,137 ♪ It's my half, half, half birthday ♪ 54 00:02:15,206 --> 00:02:17,793 ♪ It's my half birthday ♪ 55 00:02:17,862 --> 00:02:19,241 [screams] 56 00:02:19,310 --> 00:02:21,724 [thud, clatter] 57 00:02:21,793 --> 00:02:23,137 Hello, father. 58 00:02:23,206 --> 00:02:25,586 Lucy scared the ding-dang dickens out of me, 59 00:02:25,655 --> 00:02:27,793 but only because it was the middle of the night. 60 00:02:27,862 --> 00:02:30,310 She doesn't scare me during the day anymore. 61 00:02:30,379 --> 00:02:31,344 [screams] 62 00:02:31,413 --> 00:02:32,896 [thuds] 63 00:02:32,965 --> 00:02:34,689 I don't see what's so scary about me. 64 00:02:34,758 --> 00:02:37,862 [bloodcurdling scream] 65 00:02:37,931 --> 00:02:39,310 I'll get that later. 66 00:02:39,379 --> 00:02:40,758 [exhales] 67 00:02:40,827 --> 00:02:41,896 What were you doing up in the middle 68 00:02:41,965 --> 00:02:43,344 of the night anyway? 69 00:02:43,413 --> 00:02:45,689 If you must know, I've been up 58 hours straight 70 00:02:45,758 --> 00:02:49,034 for my mortician club's Three Nights of Fright. 71 00:02:49,103 --> 00:02:51,172 58 hours? 72 00:02:51,241 --> 00:02:54,482 Lincoln, family meeting whistle. 73 00:02:55,827 --> 00:02:57,310 [whistle blares] 74 00:02:57,379 --> 00:02:59,068 Another two-hour meeting 75 00:02:59,137 --> 00:03:00,965 where Dad goes on like an old man. 76 00:03:01,034 --> 00:03:02,517 [all chattering] - Order! 77 00:03:02,586 --> 00:03:03,689 [all chattering] 78 00:03:03,758 --> 00:03:05,862 Order! 79 00:03:05,931 --> 00:03:07,275 Zip it, people! 80 00:03:07,344 --> 00:03:08,448 [chattering stops] 81 00:03:08,517 --> 00:03:10,034 Your father said order. 82 00:03:10,103 --> 00:03:11,310 That I did. 83 00:03:11,379 --> 00:03:12,517 Now--[clears throat] 84 00:03:12,586 --> 00:03:14,896 as some of you may have heard-- 85 00:03:14,965 --> 00:03:15,896 We know! 86 00:03:15,965 --> 00:03:18,827 Tomorrow is your half birthday! 87 00:03:18,896 --> 00:03:20,551 Tomorrow is my half birthday. 88 00:03:20,620 --> 00:03:21,896 But that's not what this meeting's about. 89 00:03:21,965 --> 00:03:23,206 But feel free to mark it in your calendars. 90 00:03:23,275 --> 00:03:24,965 [chuckles] Moving on. 91 00:03:25,034 --> 00:03:26,758 Lucy-- 92 00:03:26,827 --> 00:03:27,931 What? 93 00:03:28,000 --> 00:03:30,206 Has been up for three days straight. 94 00:03:30,275 --> 00:03:33,551 And last night, she scared the bejesus out of me. 95 00:03:33,620 --> 00:03:36,206 So there's going to be a new rule around here. 96 00:03:36,275 --> 00:03:38,241 Probably going to be no more sneaking up on people. 97 00:03:38,310 --> 00:03:39,689 [dramatic chord] - You think so? 98 00:03:39,758 --> 00:03:41,689 [gasps] You should really start wearing a bell. 99 00:03:41,758 --> 00:03:43,448 And the new rule is-- 100 00:03:43,517 --> 00:03:45,896 [dramatic music] 101 00:03:45,965 --> 00:03:47,413 Everyone goes to bed before midnight, 102 00:03:47,482 --> 00:03:48,344 not one minute later. 103 00:03:48,413 --> 00:03:50,241 No! 104 00:03:50,310 --> 00:03:51,758 This isn't fair! It's Lucy's fault! 105 00:03:51,827 --> 00:03:53,275 Why should we have to suffer? 106 00:03:53,344 --> 00:03:54,275 Exactly, Dad. 107 00:03:54,344 --> 00:03:56,413 [all chattering] 108 00:03:57,689 --> 00:03:58,862 Order! 109 00:03:58,931 --> 00:04:00,103 Order! 110 00:04:00,172 --> 00:04:02,206 Don't make me have to count. 111 00:04:02,275 --> 00:04:03,241 Here we go. 112 00:04:03,310 --> 00:04:06,379 1, 2-- 113 00:04:06,448 --> 00:04:07,931 [chatter stops] 114 00:04:08,000 --> 00:04:09,000 [exhales] 115 00:04:09,068 --> 00:04:10,275 You did it, honey. 116 00:04:10,344 --> 00:04:12,000 Sorry I had to be so harsh with them. 117 00:04:12,068 --> 00:04:15,068 In this house, it's all for one and one for all. 118 00:04:15,137 --> 00:04:17,413 And Lucy's not the first kid to make a mistake. 119 00:04:17,482 --> 00:04:18,448 Yeah, Mom's right. 120 00:04:18,517 --> 00:04:19,413 You've all been responsible 121 00:04:19,482 --> 00:04:20,517 for new rules around here. 122 00:04:20,586 --> 00:04:23,241 [upbeat music] 123 00:04:23,310 --> 00:04:24,586 What? 124 00:04:24,655 --> 00:04:26,482 You said we could have one bowl of ice cream. 125 00:04:26,551 --> 00:04:27,896 New rule! 126 00:04:27,965 --> 00:04:31,000 One normal-sized bowl of ice cream per kid. 127 00:04:31,068 --> 00:04:32,724 By the way, we're out of mint chip. 128 00:04:32,793 --> 00:04:34,413 - Really? The whole time? - The whole time. 129 00:04:34,482 --> 00:04:36,862 [hissing] 130 00:04:38,275 --> 00:04:39,379 Don't worry. 131 00:04:39,448 --> 00:04:40,517 El Diablo won't hurt you. 132 00:04:40,586 --> 00:04:42,034 I found him in the sewer. 133 00:04:42,103 --> 00:04:43,655 [whispering] New rule. 134 00:04:43,724 --> 00:04:46,448 No bringing home stray pets. 135 00:04:47,482 --> 00:04:48,896 Sorry, Mud Pie. 136 00:04:48,965 --> 00:04:51,275 [moos] 137 00:04:51,344 --> 00:04:52,620 Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. 138 00:04:52,689 --> 00:04:55,068 It is not up for debate! 139 00:04:55,137 --> 00:04:58,413 Effective today, no one stays up past midnight. 140 00:04:58,482 --> 00:05:00,275 [dramatic drum music] 141 00:05:00,344 --> 00:05:01,724 ♪ ♪ 142 00:05:01,793 --> 00:05:04,241 Now I'm going to go clean and repair Vanzilla. 143 00:05:04,310 --> 00:05:05,517 I don't want to do it tomorrow because tomorrow 144 00:05:05,586 --> 00:05:08,000 is my, uh, half-- - We know! 145 00:05:08,068 --> 00:05:09,241 Oh. 146 00:05:09,310 --> 00:05:11,103 Feel free to mark it in your calendars. 147 00:05:12,655 --> 00:05:14,482 I need to come up with a plan. 148 00:05:14,551 --> 00:05:15,931 This is not fair. 149 00:05:16,000 --> 00:05:18,413 Man, that guy's obsessed with his half birthday. 150 00:05:18,482 --> 00:05:19,827 [ding] 151 00:05:19,896 --> 00:05:21,000 Bingo! 152 00:05:24,275 --> 00:05:26,896 [all chattering] 153 00:05:28,379 --> 00:05:29,965 OK, so here's the plan. 154 00:05:30,034 --> 00:05:31,586 Tonight at midnight, you guys take Dad out 155 00:05:31,655 --> 00:05:33,034 to Jean Juan's French Mex 156 00:05:33,103 --> 00:05:34,448 for a half birthday celebration. 157 00:05:34,517 --> 00:05:36,137 I will stay here and watch 158 00:05:36,206 --> 00:05:37,758 the "Rip Hardcore Midnight Marathon" 159 00:05:37,827 --> 00:05:39,310 and get my Macho Man badge. 160 00:05:39,379 --> 00:05:41,931 Look, Lincoln, I'm only home from college for two days. 161 00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:43,827 And we all have a lot of stuff to do. 162 00:05:43,896 --> 00:05:45,724 So if you want us to help you, 163 00:05:45,793 --> 00:05:47,000 you're going to have to help us with our stuff. 164 00:05:47,068 --> 00:05:49,241 - Yeah. - What do you need help with? 165 00:05:49,310 --> 00:05:52,172 [all speaking at once] 166 00:05:55,275 --> 00:05:57,103 Clyde? Got a code-- 167 00:05:57,172 --> 00:05:58,586 Red? 168 00:05:59,689 --> 00:06:01,000 How did you know that? 169 00:06:01,068 --> 00:06:03,241 Let's just say I "red" your mind. 170 00:06:03,310 --> 00:06:04,620 OK. 171 00:06:04,689 --> 00:06:06,103 Clyde and I will help you with your stuff, 172 00:06:06,172 --> 00:06:09,448 but we have to get moving because the clock is ticking. 173 00:06:09,517 --> 00:06:11,827 Macho. 174 00:06:11,896 --> 00:06:14,551 Clincoln McCloud, let's do this. 175 00:06:14,620 --> 00:06:16,034 Hah! 176 00:06:16,103 --> 00:06:17,655 I need you to help me brush my pageant wigs. 177 00:06:18,758 --> 00:06:23,689 Easy peasy, lemon squeezy. 178 00:06:23,758 --> 00:06:25,310 Good job. 179 00:06:25,379 --> 00:06:26,482 Here's the rest of them. 180 00:06:26,551 --> 00:06:28,103 [dramatic tone] 181 00:06:29,413 --> 00:06:30,586 Oh. 182 00:06:30,655 --> 00:06:32,206 There's more. 183 00:06:32,275 --> 00:06:34,103 ♪ ♪ 184 00:06:34,172 --> 00:06:35,310 [sighs] 185 00:06:35,379 --> 00:06:37,000 Somebody stole my boss's tofu sandwich 186 00:06:37,068 --> 00:06:38,586 from the break room at work, and now she wants all of us 187 00:06:38,655 --> 00:06:39,931 to take a lie detector test. 188 00:06:40,000 --> 00:06:41,793 I need to practice telling the truth. 189 00:06:41,862 --> 00:06:43,931 Any time you lie, it buzzes. 190 00:06:44,000 --> 00:06:45,310 OK, you're not the only sister I have to help. 191 00:06:45,379 --> 00:06:46,586 How long will this take? 192 00:06:46,655 --> 00:06:48,586 It'll go really fast. [buzzer blares] 193 00:06:48,655 --> 00:06:50,137 Kind of fast. [buzzer blares] 194 00:06:50,206 --> 00:06:51,413 It might take a really long time. 195 00:06:51,482 --> 00:06:52,689 [bell dings] 196 00:06:52,758 --> 00:06:54,103 But just ask me an easy question. 197 00:06:54,172 --> 00:06:55,655 - Am I your favorite brother? - Yes. 198 00:06:55,724 --> 00:06:56,862 [buzzer blares] 199 00:06:56,931 --> 00:06:58,827 Leni, I'm your only brother. 200 00:06:58,896 --> 00:07:02,137 I know, but sometimes you can be a little annoying. 201 00:07:02,206 --> 00:07:03,689 [buzzer blares] Pretty annoying. 202 00:07:03,758 --> 00:07:05,000 [buzzer blares] OK, fine. 203 00:07:05,068 --> 00:07:06,379 You're really annoying. 204 00:07:06,448 --> 00:07:07,793 [bell dings] 205 00:07:09,172 --> 00:07:10,724 OK, so I need a really funny closing joke 206 00:07:10,793 --> 00:07:11,724 for my comedy act. 207 00:07:11,793 --> 00:07:12,896 What do you think? 208 00:07:12,965 --> 00:07:14,275 Have a great night. 209 00:07:14,344 --> 00:07:18,310 And if you're driving home, please take a car. 210 00:07:18,379 --> 00:07:19,482 [chuckles] 211 00:07:19,551 --> 00:07:22,344 Oh my gosh, that is so funny. 212 00:07:22,413 --> 00:07:24,137 Great job. 'Kay, bye. 213 00:07:24,206 --> 00:07:25,620 Not so fast. 214 00:07:25,689 --> 00:07:27,586 I got about 50 other options, and you're not leaving 215 00:07:27,655 --> 00:07:29,758 until you hear them all. 216 00:07:29,827 --> 00:07:32,034 Two fish are in a tank, and one of them says, 217 00:07:32,103 --> 00:07:33,931 how do you drive this thing? 218 00:07:34,000 --> 00:07:35,724 Why did the chicken cross the playground? 219 00:07:35,793 --> 00:07:38,137 To get to the other slide. 220 00:07:38,206 --> 00:07:39,724 Bobby literally sent me the most 221 00:07:39,793 --> 00:07:41,379 romantic anniversary text. 222 00:07:41,448 --> 00:07:44,862 I tried to send him one, but I think I need your help. 223 00:07:44,931 --> 00:07:47,034 I'm sure what you wrote is great. 224 00:07:47,103 --> 00:07:49,586 "Bobby, I literally love that you never litter. 225 00:07:49,655 --> 00:07:51,793 "If you literally ever litter, you pick it up later, 226 00:07:51,862 --> 00:07:53,448 "which is literally not littering. 227 00:07:53,517 --> 00:07:55,620 Happy anniversary." 228 00:07:56,862 --> 00:07:58,965 Was that awful? - Literally. 229 00:07:59,034 --> 00:08:01,448 Tomorrow is my hockey team's championship game, 230 00:08:01,517 --> 00:08:04,034 and I need to come up with the perfect motivational speech 231 00:08:04,103 --> 00:08:05,413 to, uh-- 232 00:08:05,482 --> 00:08:07,034 - Motivate them? - Yes! 233 00:08:07,103 --> 00:08:11,241 See, this is why I need you, Mr. Good-with-Words Guy. 234 00:08:11,310 --> 00:08:12,724 Let me give you what I got so far. 235 00:08:12,793 --> 00:08:14,275 [clears throat] 236 00:08:14,344 --> 00:08:16,793 We got to win this game, you space wasters! 237 00:08:16,862 --> 00:08:18,241 [thuds] - Oh! 238 00:08:18,310 --> 00:08:20,482 [air horn blares] 239 00:08:20,551 --> 00:08:23,137 I'm entering Todd in a robotics competition, 240 00:08:23,206 --> 00:08:26,310 and it seems another contestant also has a robot named Todd. 241 00:08:26,379 --> 00:08:28,620 Why can't he change his robot name? 242 00:08:28,689 --> 00:08:30,448 [sighs] 243 00:08:30,517 --> 00:08:33,827 His Todd was named after his recently deceased grandfather. 244 00:08:33,896 --> 00:08:35,482 Some guys have all the luck. 245 00:08:35,551 --> 00:08:36,896 So you need me to come up with a new name 246 00:08:36,965 --> 00:08:38,000 for Robot Todd? 247 00:08:38,068 --> 00:08:39,758 - Precisely. - How about Beau? 248 00:08:39,827 --> 00:08:41,172 - No. - Jamie? 249 00:08:41,241 --> 00:08:42,482 Lame-y. 250 00:08:42,551 --> 00:08:45,275 This is a list of names that I don't like. 251 00:08:46,896 --> 00:08:49,655 We've been here for hours. 252 00:08:49,724 --> 00:08:53,103 The world record for a guinea pig jump is 48 centimeters. 253 00:08:53,172 --> 00:08:54,758 Sprinks here is going to shatter that record 254 00:08:54,827 --> 00:08:57,172 by a full 2 centimeters. 255 00:08:57,241 --> 00:08:59,068 But according to the big shots at Guinness, 256 00:08:59,137 --> 00:09:01,241 I need a witness to verify it. 257 00:09:03,000 --> 00:09:04,655 Fly, Sprinks! 258 00:09:04,724 --> 00:09:07,448 [triumphant music] 259 00:09:07,517 --> 00:09:08,586 [music fades] 260 00:09:08,655 --> 00:09:11,448 Probably just nerves. 261 00:09:11,517 --> 00:09:14,379 [electric guitar playing] 262 00:09:14,448 --> 00:09:19,103 ♪ ♪ 263 00:09:19,172 --> 00:09:20,413 Oh, hey, little dude. 264 00:09:20,482 --> 00:09:22,310 I'm just finishing up this banging track. 265 00:09:22,379 --> 00:09:25,896 But it's missing a little sultry southern sound, 266 00:09:25,965 --> 00:09:27,827 a.k.a. the cowbell. 267 00:09:27,896 --> 00:09:29,034 So grab a drumstick. 268 00:09:29,103 --> 00:09:30,482 I need some cowbell. 269 00:09:30,551 --> 00:09:32,551 Lincoln, where are you? 270 00:09:32,620 --> 00:09:34,034 I got to go. 271 00:09:36,689 --> 00:09:38,275 Lucy? 272 00:09:38,344 --> 00:09:40,344 [door creaks] 273 00:09:40,413 --> 00:09:42,655 [eerie music] 274 00:09:42,724 --> 00:09:43,793 ♪ ♪ 275 00:09:43,862 --> 00:09:45,000 Lucy? 276 00:09:47,344 --> 00:09:48,655 [screams] 277 00:09:48,724 --> 00:09:50,137 Hello, brother. 278 00:09:51,758 --> 00:09:53,068 Please stop doing that. 279 00:09:53,137 --> 00:09:55,448 She scared me too. 280 00:09:55,517 --> 00:09:57,965 Let's not mention this in our Macho Man applications. 281 00:09:58,034 --> 00:09:59,620 Why don't we just ask your dad 282 00:09:59,689 --> 00:10:00,862 if he'll change the bedtime rule? 283 00:10:00,931 --> 00:10:02,827 He's fixing Vanzilla today. 284 00:10:02,896 --> 00:10:04,689 It's not a good time to ask him for stuff. 285 00:10:04,758 --> 00:10:07,517 I am not a good mechanic! 286 00:10:07,586 --> 00:10:12,000 I just wanted to replace the windshield wiper fluid! 287 00:10:13,310 --> 00:10:14,827 I need to stay up for five more hours 288 00:10:14,896 --> 00:10:16,689 to complete my Three Nights of Fright. 289 00:10:16,758 --> 00:10:19,413 And although I'd never admit it to my fellow club members, 290 00:10:19,482 --> 00:10:21,034 I'm fading. 291 00:10:21,103 --> 00:10:23,275 I need you to keep me awake. 292 00:10:23,344 --> 00:10:24,758 This isn't going to work, Lincoln. 293 00:10:24,827 --> 00:10:25,862 We're running out of time. 294 00:10:25,931 --> 00:10:27,310 You have too many sisters. 295 00:10:28,758 --> 00:10:30,379 That's it, Clyde! [ding] 296 00:10:30,448 --> 00:10:32,000 I just had another idea. 297 00:10:32,068 --> 00:10:34,517 Come with me. [upbeat music] 298 00:10:34,586 --> 00:10:37,620 You need a cowbell player to go with your blaring solos. 299 00:10:37,689 --> 00:10:39,413 You need to stay awake. 300 00:10:39,482 --> 00:10:43,137 ♪ ♪ 301 00:10:43,206 --> 00:10:45,482 You need to know if your joke's actually funny. 302 00:10:45,551 --> 00:10:48,310 You need to practice telling the truth. 303 00:10:48,379 --> 00:10:50,206 You need your guinea pig to set a world record. 304 00:10:50,275 --> 00:10:51,551 [grunts] 305 00:10:51,620 --> 00:10:52,896 You need to practice your motivational speech. 306 00:10:52,965 --> 00:10:54,965 - Let's do this! - Yeah! 307 00:10:55,034 --> 00:10:58,482 You need to write your boyfriend a romantic text. 308 00:10:58,551 --> 00:11:00,000 Clyde can help you write it. 309 00:11:00,068 --> 00:11:01,931 He's the best at this stuff. 310 00:11:02,000 --> 00:11:04,586 I wouldn't say I'm the best. 311 00:11:04,655 --> 00:11:06,172 [clears throat] 312 00:11:06,241 --> 00:11:09,586 Bobby, how lucky am I that in this infinite universe 313 00:11:09,655 --> 00:11:13,827 our souls exist in the same place at the same time? 314 00:11:15,172 --> 00:11:18,793 Love that is true, love that is real, 315 00:11:18,862 --> 00:11:21,241 love that is love. 316 00:11:21,310 --> 00:11:22,965 Oh, Clyde. 317 00:11:23,034 --> 00:11:25,758 That is literally so perfect. 318 00:11:25,827 --> 00:11:29,448 My dads and I watch a lot of romantic comedies together. 319 00:11:29,517 --> 00:11:31,448 Oh, and if you could run through an airport 320 00:11:31,517 --> 00:11:33,793 and read him your text right before he gets on an airplane, 321 00:11:33,862 --> 00:11:35,068 that'd be ideal. 322 00:11:35,137 --> 00:11:37,413 [text whooshes] 323 00:11:37,482 --> 00:11:38,551 I did it! 324 00:11:38,620 --> 00:11:40,241 I sent the perfect text! 325 00:11:42,413 --> 00:11:45,310 [music playing] 326 00:11:45,379 --> 00:11:48,172 ♪ ♪ 327 00:11:48,241 --> 00:11:50,103 I laid down the perfect track. 328 00:11:50,172 --> 00:11:53,862 I stayed up for 72 hours straight. 329 00:11:53,931 --> 00:11:55,034 [thuds] 330 00:11:55,103 --> 00:11:57,172 I said sprocket, not socket. 331 00:11:57,241 --> 00:11:59,862 [laughs] That was a really funny joke. 332 00:11:59,931 --> 00:12:02,137 [bell dings] 333 00:12:02,206 --> 00:12:03,758 I wrote a funny closing joke! 334 00:12:03,827 --> 00:12:05,379 I told the truth! 335 00:12:05,448 --> 00:12:07,896 You gotta ask yourself one question-- 336 00:12:07,965 --> 00:12:09,793 how bad do I want it? 337 00:12:09,862 --> 00:12:11,586 Now go get it! 338 00:12:12,793 --> 00:12:15,586 [dramatic triumphant music] 339 00:12:15,655 --> 00:12:22,586 ♪ ♪ 340 00:12:25,586 --> 00:12:27,310 Yes! 341 00:12:27,379 --> 00:12:29,000 I'm getting in the "Guinness Book"! 342 00:12:29,068 --> 00:12:30,413 I wrote the perfect speech! 343 00:12:30,482 --> 00:12:32,068 Yes! 344 00:12:32,137 --> 00:12:33,862 [both grunt] 345 00:12:33,931 --> 00:12:36,620 [gasps] I brushed all my pageant wigs! 346 00:12:37,862 --> 00:12:39,241 All that's left to do is come up 347 00:12:39,310 --> 00:12:42,137 with a name for Lisa's robot, and then operation 348 00:12:42,206 --> 00:12:44,034 watch "Rip Hardcore" and get my Macho Man badge 349 00:12:44,103 --> 00:12:45,310 while you guys take dad out 350 00:12:45,379 --> 00:12:47,862 for his half birthday is ready to launch 351 00:12:47,931 --> 00:12:49,413 with time to spare. 352 00:12:49,482 --> 00:12:52,000 [clock ticking] - Macho. 353 00:12:52,068 --> 00:12:53,586 I may be a genius, Lola. 354 00:12:53,655 --> 00:12:55,655 But what do you think's going to happen when Dad notices 355 00:12:55,724 --> 00:12:57,275 you're not at his party? 356 00:12:57,344 --> 00:12:58,827 I didn't think about that. 357 00:12:58,896 --> 00:13:00,241 If Dad sees I'm not there, 358 00:13:00,310 --> 00:13:02,000 then he's going to want to come get me. 359 00:13:02,068 --> 00:13:03,827 How could I have missed this? 360 00:13:03,896 --> 00:13:08,034 I'm the man with the plan, but my plan was flawed. 361 00:13:08,103 --> 00:13:10,137 I have to be here to get my Macho Man badge, 362 00:13:10,206 --> 00:13:11,931 but I have to be there so Dad doesn't find out 363 00:13:12,000 --> 00:13:13,241 I skipped his party. 364 00:13:13,310 --> 00:13:15,896 Too bad you can't be two places at once. 365 00:13:15,965 --> 00:13:17,793 Or can I? 366 00:13:17,862 --> 00:13:18,862 [ding] 367 00:13:18,931 --> 00:13:20,551 The man with the plan is back. 368 00:13:22,068 --> 00:13:23,551 Lincoln. 369 00:13:23,620 --> 00:13:24,620 Excuse me? 370 00:13:26,448 --> 00:13:28,275 We're going to name your robot Lincoln. 371 00:13:32,827 --> 00:13:35,724 [mariachi music] 372 00:13:35,793 --> 00:13:37,931 ♪ ♪ 373 00:13:38,000 --> 00:13:40,344 [mechanical whirring] 374 00:13:40,413 --> 00:13:42,413 I am having such a good time. 375 00:13:44,137 --> 00:13:45,379 [chuckles] 376 00:13:45,448 --> 00:13:47,965 Gwen, how's that beef baguette in a bread bowl? 377 00:13:48,034 --> 00:13:49,551 Great. Perfect pre-game meal 378 00:13:49,620 --> 00:13:51,413 for my hockey championship tomorrow. 379 00:13:51,482 --> 00:13:53,103 Carbo load! 380 00:13:53,172 --> 00:13:55,586 You still need to chew carbs, sweetie. 381 00:13:55,655 --> 00:13:56,862 I do? 382 00:13:56,931 --> 00:13:58,448 [rock music] 383 00:13:58,517 --> 00:14:00,620 So the man with the plan came through again. 384 00:14:00,689 --> 00:14:04,413 In 13 minutes, we're going to be official Macho Men. 385 00:14:04,482 --> 00:14:06,172 What happens if your dad notices 386 00:14:06,241 --> 00:14:07,724 it's a robot and not you? 387 00:14:07,793 --> 00:14:10,137 Why does everyone keep poking holes in my plan? 388 00:14:10,206 --> 00:14:11,517 Let's check Lisa's robot cam. 389 00:14:13,068 --> 00:14:14,275 How about you, Linc? 390 00:14:14,344 --> 00:14:15,965 How's that burger treating you? 391 00:14:16,034 --> 00:14:18,793 [suspenseful music] 392 00:14:18,862 --> 00:14:25,793 ♪ ♪ 393 00:14:25,862 --> 00:14:27,620 [robotic voice] The modern hamburger was a result 394 00:14:27,689 --> 00:14:29,379 of the emergence of the working class 395 00:14:29,448 --> 00:14:30,931 and the demand for mass-produced, 396 00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,241 affordable food. 397 00:14:32,310 --> 00:14:35,517 ♪ ♪ 398 00:14:35,586 --> 00:14:36,551 Oh, no. 399 00:14:36,620 --> 00:14:38,344 [whispering] What's going on? 400 00:14:38,413 --> 00:14:40,758 Sometimes the artificial intelligence mode overrides 401 00:14:40,827 --> 00:14:42,655 conversational tones. 402 00:14:42,724 --> 00:14:45,655 [tense music] 403 00:14:45,724 --> 00:14:52,620 ♪ ♪ 404 00:14:54,137 --> 00:14:55,344 Wow, Linc, you've really been boning up 405 00:14:55,413 --> 00:14:56,551 on your meat trivia, huh? 406 00:14:56,620 --> 00:14:57,827 Good job, buddy. 407 00:14:57,896 --> 00:14:59,413 [sighs] 408 00:14:59,482 --> 00:15:00,517 Yeah. 409 00:15:00,586 --> 00:15:01,551 Lincoln. 410 00:15:03,206 --> 00:15:04,206 It worked! 411 00:15:04,275 --> 00:15:05,862 I never had any doubts. 412 00:15:05,931 --> 00:15:07,344 [exhales] 413 00:15:07,413 --> 00:15:09,862 T-minus 10 minutes till the midnight marathon. 414 00:15:09,931 --> 00:15:12,655 I think I just felt a chest hair come in. 415 00:15:12,724 --> 00:15:13,965 How you doing? 416 00:15:14,034 --> 00:15:15,862 [sighs] I've never felt like more of a man. 417 00:15:15,931 --> 00:15:16,965 [timer dings] 418 00:15:17,034 --> 00:15:18,448 My lemon bars are ready. 419 00:15:19,724 --> 00:15:24,827 all: ♪ Happy half birthday to you ♪ 420 00:15:24,896 --> 00:15:30,931 ♪ You ♪ 421 00:15:31,000 --> 00:15:32,655 You're welcome. 422 00:15:32,724 --> 00:15:34,000 Here we go. 423 00:15:34,068 --> 00:15:35,551 [inhales] 424 00:15:35,620 --> 00:15:37,448 Make sure not to verbalize your wish, Father. 425 00:15:37,517 --> 00:15:39,965 It is considered taboo. 426 00:15:40,034 --> 00:15:41,275 You know what, buddy? 427 00:15:41,344 --> 00:15:43,379 I don't need to make a wish, because tonight, 428 00:15:43,448 --> 00:15:45,448 all my wishes have come true. 429 00:15:45,517 --> 00:15:47,517 - Aww. - [chuckles] 430 00:15:47,586 --> 00:15:49,206 - Diablo sauce? - [screams] 431 00:15:49,275 --> 00:15:50,896 [water splashes] [electrical buzzing] 432 00:15:50,965 --> 00:15:54,000 Parfaits-- the modern hamburger--happy-- 433 00:15:54,068 --> 00:15:55,068 [voice deepens] Meat trivia. 434 00:15:55,137 --> 00:15:56,137 [all scream] 435 00:15:56,206 --> 00:15:57,482 Oh! 436 00:15:57,551 --> 00:15:58,758 Fire! 437 00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:00,000 Fire. Ow. 438 00:16:00,068 --> 00:16:03,275 Pain. I'm melting. 439 00:16:03,344 --> 00:16:05,862 [dramatic music] 440 00:16:05,931 --> 00:16:07,482 [mechanical chirps] 441 00:16:07,551 --> 00:16:09,655 What is going on here? 442 00:16:10,896 --> 00:16:13,517 That's not Lincoln, Dad. 443 00:16:16,137 --> 00:16:17,448 It's Todd. 444 00:16:17,517 --> 00:16:19,689 I programmed him to have Lincoln's voice. 445 00:16:19,758 --> 00:16:20,965 What? 446 00:16:21,034 --> 00:16:22,517 Well, why? 447 00:16:25,517 --> 00:16:27,689 Ahh! All you hardcore fans, 448 00:16:27,758 --> 00:16:30,517 enter the promo code "MACHOMAN" right now. 449 00:16:30,586 --> 00:16:32,689 You'll receive your Macho Man badges in three to five 450 00:16:32,758 --> 00:16:34,586 business days, three to five! 451 00:16:34,655 --> 00:16:35,758 I'm going to enter the promo code. 452 00:16:35,827 --> 00:16:37,379 - On it. - It's now or never 453 00:16:37,448 --> 00:16:39,379 for your Macho Man dreams to come true! 454 00:16:39,448 --> 00:16:40,655 Lincoln wanted to stay up to watch 455 00:16:40,724 --> 00:16:42,000 the midnight marathon so that he 456 00:16:42,068 --> 00:16:43,517 could get his Macho Man badge. 457 00:16:43,586 --> 00:16:46,275 He asked us to take you out for your half birthday. 458 00:16:46,344 --> 00:16:48,310 So you wouldn't make him go to bed. 459 00:16:48,379 --> 00:16:50,034 So the only reason you're all here 460 00:16:50,103 --> 00:16:51,862 is to help Lincoln with his scheme. 461 00:16:51,931 --> 00:16:54,655 [light tense music] 462 00:16:54,724 --> 00:16:55,827 ♪ ♪ 463 00:16:55,896 --> 00:16:56,965 Yeah. 464 00:16:57,034 --> 00:16:58,344 Well, don't I feel like a fool. 465 00:16:58,413 --> 00:17:00,241 Why aren't you filling in your Macho Man code? 466 00:17:00,310 --> 00:17:01,689 Last chance to enter the code 467 00:17:01,758 --> 00:17:04,172 and get your Macho Man badge! 468 00:17:04,241 --> 00:17:07,103 You know, when I was a kid, there was this really 469 00:17:07,172 --> 00:17:10,517 popular guy named Jake Strong. 470 00:17:11,724 --> 00:17:13,413 And we had the exact same birthday. 471 00:17:13,482 --> 00:17:15,655 And every year, all the neighborhood kids 472 00:17:15,724 --> 00:17:19,000 would go to Jake's party, and no one would come to mine. 473 00:17:20,000 --> 00:17:22,379 And my mom, she tried to entice the kids to come to the party. 474 00:17:22,448 --> 00:17:25,103 One year, we even had a miniature pony. 475 00:17:25,172 --> 00:17:27,275 But it didn't work. 476 00:17:27,344 --> 00:17:28,275 Nobody came? 477 00:17:28,344 --> 00:17:30,103 No. 478 00:17:30,172 --> 00:17:33,310 That pony bucked me off and ran straight to Jake's. 479 00:17:34,793 --> 00:17:37,551 I think he was attracted to all the music and laughter. 480 00:17:37,620 --> 00:17:41,655 Anyway, my mom had this amazing idea. 481 00:17:41,724 --> 00:17:45,241 And she decided that instead of trying to compete with Jake, 482 00:17:45,310 --> 00:17:48,310 we'd start celebrating my half birthday. 483 00:17:49,275 --> 00:17:50,931 And it worked. 484 00:17:51,000 --> 00:17:52,275 All the kids came. 485 00:17:52,344 --> 00:17:55,448 And you know, I just was never happier. 486 00:17:55,517 --> 00:17:57,586 [sentimental music] 487 00:17:57,655 --> 00:17:59,206 And I always dreamed that you guys would throw me 488 00:17:59,275 --> 00:18:01,068 a half birthday party, 489 00:18:01,137 --> 00:18:04,206 but I guess some things are too good to be true. 490 00:18:04,275 --> 00:18:05,896 10, 9-- 491 00:18:05,965 --> 00:18:09,000 Lincoln, 10 seconds or you won't get your badge. 492 00:18:09,068 --> 00:18:12,103 6, 5, 4-- 493 00:18:12,172 --> 00:18:13,793 You know what, Clyde? 494 00:18:13,862 --> 00:18:15,758 I don't feel like a Macho Man right now. 495 00:18:15,827 --> 00:18:17,793 [grunts] Get your badge. 496 00:18:19,482 --> 00:18:21,689 I guess I'll just call a cab to take us home 497 00:18:21,758 --> 00:18:24,000 since I couldn't fix Vanzilla either. 498 00:18:24,068 --> 00:18:25,344 Oh, honey. 499 00:18:25,413 --> 00:18:26,862 No. 500 00:18:26,931 --> 00:18:28,655 I already called a cab. 501 00:18:28,724 --> 00:18:29,586 [sighs] 502 00:18:29,655 --> 00:18:32,137 [mechanical whirring] 503 00:18:32,206 --> 00:18:34,724 ♪ ♪ 504 00:18:34,793 --> 00:18:35,827 Hey, Todd. 505 00:18:36,965 --> 00:18:38,172 [grunts] 506 00:18:38,241 --> 00:18:40,448 [mariachi music playing] 507 00:18:40,517 --> 00:18:42,482 I love cake. 508 00:18:42,551 --> 00:18:45,448 [somber music] 509 00:18:45,517 --> 00:18:47,758 ♪ ♪ 510 00:18:47,827 --> 00:18:49,379 Surprise! 511 00:18:49,448 --> 00:18:51,551 Wait, wh-- what? 512 00:18:52,482 --> 00:18:55,344 all: Surprise? 513 00:18:55,413 --> 00:18:57,172 It's your surprise half birthday party. 514 00:18:57,241 --> 00:18:58,344 I had to get you out of the house 515 00:18:58,413 --> 00:19:00,034 so we could decorate, right, guys? 516 00:19:00,103 --> 00:19:01,448 Yeah. 517 00:19:01,517 --> 00:19:02,896 [all speaking at once] 518 00:19:02,965 --> 00:19:06,448 Wait, so that whole story about Lincoln's plan? 519 00:19:06,517 --> 00:19:09,655 It was all part of our bigger plan, right, guys? 520 00:19:09,724 --> 00:19:11,000 - Yeah. - Of course. 521 00:19:11,068 --> 00:19:12,379 [overlapping chatter] 522 00:19:12,448 --> 00:19:14,103 Wait, you were all in on this? 523 00:19:14,172 --> 00:19:15,344 Yeah. 524 00:19:15,413 --> 00:19:16,862 It's like you said, Dad. 525 00:19:16,931 --> 00:19:19,379 In the Loud House, it is all for one and one for all. 526 00:19:19,448 --> 00:19:21,241 [sentimental music] 527 00:19:21,310 --> 00:19:23,586 And... 528 00:19:25,517 --> 00:19:28,586 We have another special surprise for you. 529 00:19:28,655 --> 00:19:30,620 I wrote you a half birthday song. 530 00:19:30,689 --> 00:19:32,620 I don't think this could get any better. 531 00:19:32,689 --> 00:19:35,275 And I'm going to kick it with a little cowbell. 532 00:19:35,344 --> 00:19:36,551 It just did. 533 00:19:37,965 --> 00:19:39,689 My real birthday was just a couple weeks ago, 534 00:19:39,758 --> 00:19:41,586 and nobody remembered. [chuckles] 535 00:19:41,655 --> 00:19:42,827 [rock music playing] 536 00:19:42,896 --> 00:19:45,000 You know what? all: What? 537 00:19:45,068 --> 00:19:46,827 ♪ Let's just rock this thing ♪ 538 00:19:46,896 --> 00:19:49,551 [cheering] - 1, 2, 3, 4! 539 00:19:49,620 --> 00:19:52,448 ♪ You thought we didn't listen ♪ 540 00:19:52,517 --> 00:19:53,551 all: ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 541 00:19:53,620 --> 00:19:56,137 ♪ Listen, you thought wrong ♪ 542 00:19:56,206 --> 00:19:57,482 all: ♪ Yeah ♪ 543 00:19:57,551 --> 00:20:00,517 ♪ We've news for you, Dad ♪ 544 00:20:00,586 --> 00:20:02,206 ♪ You're not just great ♪ 545 00:20:02,275 --> 00:20:03,586 ♪ You're rad! ♪ 546 00:20:03,655 --> 00:20:05,655 ♪ Happy half birthday ♪ 547 00:20:05,724 --> 00:20:07,379 all: ♪ Happy half birthday ♪ 548 00:20:07,448 --> 00:20:11,448 ♪ Happy half birthday to the best dad in the world ♪ 549 00:20:11,517 --> 00:20:15,344 ♪ Happy half birthday from your house full of girls ♪ 550 00:20:15,413 --> 00:20:17,103 both: ♪ And boys ♪ 551 00:20:17,172 --> 00:20:18,379 ♪ Ooh, oh, oh ♪ 552 00:20:18,448 --> 00:20:19,896 ♪ Ooh, oh, oh ♪ 553 00:20:19,965 --> 00:20:22,379 all: ♪ Happy half birthday ♪ 554 00:20:22,448 --> 00:20:23,758 ♪ Happy, happy, yeah ♪ 555 00:20:23,827 --> 00:20:26,517 ♪ Big fun is our goal ♪ 556 00:20:26,586 --> 00:20:27,758 all: ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 557 00:20:27,827 --> 00:20:30,275 ♪ That's just how we roll ♪ 558 00:20:30,344 --> 00:20:31,689 all: Hey! 559 00:20:31,758 --> 00:20:34,344 ♪ We hope you like this song ♪ 560 00:20:34,413 --> 00:20:38,655 all: ♪ And so you know, you're way cooler than Jake Strong ♪ 561 00:20:38,724 --> 00:20:41,034 ♪ Happy half birthday! ♪ 562 00:20:41,103 --> 00:20:42,551 Yeah! 563 00:20:42,620 --> 00:20:44,000 - Love you, Dad! - Love you, Dad! 564 00:20:44,068 --> 00:20:45,241 Thank you! 565 00:20:45,310 --> 00:20:47,275 That was--that was perfect. 566 00:20:47,344 --> 00:20:49,620 Where are Leni and Lana? 567 00:20:49,689 --> 00:20:52,448 What would a half birthday be without a big present? 568 00:20:52,517 --> 00:20:54,275 [bright orchestral music] 569 00:20:56,137 --> 00:20:57,724 Please be a pony. 570 00:20:57,793 --> 00:21:01,517 [gasps] Vanzilla, you're beautiful. 571 00:21:01,586 --> 00:21:03,448 She's purring like a kitten. 572 00:21:03,517 --> 00:21:06,344 ♪ ♪ 573 00:21:06,413 --> 00:21:08,344 Vanzilla! 574 00:21:08,413 --> 00:21:11,241 And I combined all my ribbons from my ribbon collection 575 00:21:11,310 --> 00:21:12,931 to make that pretty bow. 576 00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,793 ♪ ♪ 577 00:21:15,862 --> 00:21:17,000 Aww. 578 00:21:18,862 --> 00:21:21,551 This is the greatest night of my life. 579 00:21:21,620 --> 00:21:23,793 And I am the luckiest dad in the world 580 00:21:23,862 --> 00:21:26,137 because I have the best kids ever. 581 00:21:27,517 --> 00:21:28,689 Wait. 582 00:21:28,758 --> 00:21:30,551 Linc, what about your midnight marathon 583 00:21:30,620 --> 00:21:31,793 and your Macho Man badge? 584 00:21:31,862 --> 00:21:33,758 I don't mean a badge from Rip Hardcore 585 00:21:33,827 --> 00:21:36,586 to prove that I'm a man, because a real man 586 00:21:36,655 --> 00:21:38,586 is a guy who loves his family and always 587 00:21:38,655 --> 00:21:40,137 does the right thing. 588 00:21:40,206 --> 00:21:42,448 ♪ ♪ 589 00:21:42,517 --> 00:21:44,275 [rock music playing] 590 00:21:44,344 --> 00:21:45,827 ♪ ♪ 591 00:21:45,896 --> 00:21:46,862 all: Yeah! 592 00:21:46,931 --> 00:21:53,862 ♪ ♪ 593 00:21:58,275 --> 00:21:59,896 [mechanical whirring] 594 00:21:59,965 --> 00:22:04,034 It seems there really is no stronger bond than family. 595 00:22:04,103 --> 00:22:09,241 ♪ ♪ 596 00:22:12,241 --> 00:22:13,620 [rock music playing] - You know what? 597 00:22:13,689 --> 00:22:15,517 - What? - Let's just rock this thing! 598 00:22:15,586 --> 00:22:17,000 [cheering] 599 00:22:17,068 --> 00:22:18,896 all: 1, 2, 3, 4! 600 00:22:18,965 --> 00:22:21,482 ♪ You thought we didn't listen ♪ 601 00:22:21,551 --> 00:22:22,965 all: ♪ Yeah, yeah ♪ 602 00:22:23,034 --> 00:22:25,448 ♪ Listen, you thought wrong ♪ 603 00:22:25,517 --> 00:22:26,827 all: ♪ Yeah ♪ 604 00:22:26,896 --> 00:22:29,793 ♪ We've got news for you, Dad ♪ 605 00:22:29,862 --> 00:22:31,448 ♪ You're not just great ♪ 606 00:22:31,517 --> 00:22:32,827 ♪ You're rad! ♪ 607 00:22:32,896 --> 00:22:35,103 all: Happy half birthday! 608 00:22:35,172 --> 00:22:36,379 Yeah! 609 00:22:36,448 --> 00:22:38,724 [laughter] 610 00:22:38,774 --> 00:22:43,324 Repair and Synchronization by Easy Subtitles Synchronizer 1.0.0.0